Yet another impromptu meeting with my adviser today made me realize that I have managed to eliminate the word "stress" from my vocabulary, consciously but not entirely purposely. In keeping with my theme of remolding my persona, I have abstained from saying things like, "Omg, I am so stressed out" or "I'm completely freaking out right now," because I don't want people to see me as the super stressed girl, like everyone in high school did. Every time I wanted to say it, I'd pause and rephrase my thought, and time by time, abstention by abstention, it worked. What's more is that now that I don't acknowledge being stressed, I don't internalize it. I've had a few times when my body had to actually tell me I was stressed by doing crazy things like my mouth swelling up (but that was also in conjunction with an allergy attack, so that's a sort of dicey example).
I'm creating my own reality. Buddha would be proud.
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