Laws of the Universe

There are some laws of the universe. Some are pretty basic, like: what goes up must come down and your socks will get lost in the abyss of the dryer. Others I am just now learning.

For instance, you can work at a store from, say...12:00-7:00 and not see anyone between 12:30 and 6:50. Invariably a herd of people will crash through the door as you were getting up to lock it, requesting to see three different models of bike for each of their five children. Or they'll do my favorite, "I'd like a bike." Well, good first step. Good thing you're in a bike shop. Then you have to spend ten years attempting to figure out what they want the bike for, ("Oh, you know, riding..."), etc. Then they will ask you for every item you don't have readily available on the floor. By the time you finally rid yourself of them, you must run to lock the door and try not to feel bad that there's someone in the parking lot moseying toward the shop at 7:15.

Another rule is that you can ask your manager all day long for something to do, as you are just sitting there doing nothing, which means checking Facebook every twenty minutes, donating 8000 grains of rice from playing freerice for two hours, and organizing paper clips. Then, at the same time the herd of elephants appears, the manager will say, "Oh yes, I have a thing for you to do and it will suck." Except they don't warn you it will suck, they just tell you to make a list of the prices on 40 pairs of sunglasses. I'm not complaining, really. I have a very chill job. Sometimes I just wish the stampede would come at 3:00 so I'd stop eating pita chips. I'm slightly afraid my eyeballs will fall out from staring at this screen for so many hours.